Starving for attention

Trying to take a photo
Trying to take a photo

So, for the last few weeks I have been working just about every single night. And nearly every single night of work has come to mean an overnight. Showing up at ten in the afternoon and then leaving around six in the morning. You know, your typical overnight shift.

In that time span I have heard, read and seen so many things that have irritated me to the point of me having to write this post. Now, I know that there some posts I’ve had that are fairly close in this nature. One of which I sort of question my direction in life and some of the decisions I have made over the years.

I’m not sorry, remorseful, regretful or even upset by those choices. I’ve learned from them all. Mistakes I’ve made, things I’ve said and more often than not things I haven’t said but that goes far more than I wish to really talk about. The thing that has really come to irk me is the Debbie Downers of life.

Debbie Downer?

You heard me right and you read it right. You know the type. Always looking down at oneself, thinking negative, and just plain sucks the life out of the room the moment they enter it. Now, it does sound a little extreme but it can be true.

I cannot stand those people. I’ve learned to ignore them over the years and thankfully all I hear is music when they talk.

Along side the Debbies is the Pity Partyers.

The what?

The Pity Partyers. Yeah, I know not exactly an actual word but it gets the job done for what I need and want. What I mean by those people are the ones that look for handouts in life. They often like to play the pity card in their favor. You know, oh, my back hurts so I can’t do that right now, maybe tomorrow. Or better yet is the one that complains that they are only working two days but when it comes down to covering shifts they can’t do for some reason.

It infuriates me when people like that land a job when there are others willing to work. Call it laziness, sloth, sin, whatever you want it just makes my angry to see and hear people moan and groan about simple things. I think part of that comes from how I grew up.

Growing up wasn’t luxurious for me and my sister. At least by many people it wouldn’t be considered that. I can recall days when I would see that look on my dad’s face when we would go to a store, I would ask to get something and he would say no. Not because he felt we didn’t need it but because he simply couldn’t afford it. You could tell he wanted to buy it. It hurt him to say no. And often times I do feel the same way.

I look at myself in the mirror everyday and wonder. Am I really that much different from him? In some ways I am. I’m not saying it’s bad. I think more recently we both have a lot of things in common.

Some history

As many of our friends and family know, Jamie chose to leave her job at the beginning of the year ( January ). She has been that little thorn on my side, that itch I can never really reach and an amazing mother and supporter. To this day I still wonder why she puts up with me but now I can look at SJ and know why.

Now, being the sole provider has not been the easiest thing in the world. I quit working Mel’s and chose to work Starbucks only. Some people may wonder but what it really came down to was my happiness.

These last two months, though, have been a little rougher for us. Jamie decided to join the working-force and began looking for a job. She found one, got the job and quickly realized she was a little over her head. It happens. She then found another opportunity but didn’t pan out entirely.

Finally, she landed a job that she is looking forward to doing. We are both super elated and can’t wait for her start. She looked at me and asked if that reduced some stress out of my life with which I quickly replied yes.

The reason I’m sharing this is because it needs to shared. Part of it is because I know SJ in a few years will find this and ask me or Jamie about his childhood and infancy. What we did, why did things and how we lived. Yeah, I can tell him that we lived simple lives and worked hard for the things we wanted but he may not fully believe us.

The other part because I know that at least one person will read this and agree with me that you can’t go through life expecting handouts.


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