When the heart aches

I’m sitting in the lobby of the hotel I’m staying at. It’s one thirty in the morning and I can’t sleep. Like really I can’t sleep. I’m wide awake and I can’t stop by brain from thinking. I’ve tried, many, many times. I have been for the last two hours. Yet, I’m still awake.

There are a lot of things on my mind of course. Some good, some bad and some in between. As some of my friends and coworkers know I got a chance to attend WordCamp San Francisco this year. Last year I attended with Jamie and SJ. Mind you he was barely a year and we only really stayed for the first day. Didn’t matter because I had a great time and spent it with my wife, my little one and a few people I had met prior to that.

This year is no exception. Well, sort of. You see, this year I’m attending by myself. The reason being I was invited to be a part of the contributor days and a part of the community summit. I won’t go too much in-depth because it’s not really necessary.

This year I chose to not only attend but to volunteer in the conference as well. It was a great experience that I think everybody should partake in. Especially those that work with software they like to use; give back something, anything.

The downside is that I’m away from my family. I’m not used being away this long. Don’t think I could ever do it. I love my family too much to be separated for so long. I miss them and it often does show. No, I won’t hide those feelings or emotions because I’m human. We all experience it at one point or another. It hurts. Truly hurts.

See, the good side is that I’m doing what I love as well. Jamie said something to me that really made me think about this path I’ve chosen. This trail I’ve been led down. I’m pretty certain I was meant to walk down this path and it will continue to get better and better. It shows on my face. I’m happier.

We’ve been keeping in touch by texting and when we can FaceTime. It’s been tough on both of us. A lot of that is because we’ve never been in this situation. We’re in uncharted territory. It’s fun but scary at the same time. We’ve never been apart for this long. Like ever. I think the longest would be a full twenty-four plus hours. Sounds really strange doesn’t it? I say hours because I measure the time we aren’t in the same room over the same roof.

You know what though? When this is over I’ll be at home, relaxing, spending time with my family and still contributing to the community I am happy to be a part of.

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